Sugar Explosion!
by Hyper Kid
Summary: Sorry ladies and gents, but I'm a crazy person! Somehow, a select number of 'respected' ninja have managed to get themselves wired out of their minds on sugar! Implied Sasu/Naru, and possibly some others it's all just for fun, and I'm sure fun will be had


One Fine Sugar Explosion

I'm sorry my dears, I couldn't resist firing our dearly beloved ninja up on SOMETHING and letting them fly! I'm having a lot of fun here, and if anyone doesn't really like my insanely nutty humour, I'm sorry. Not. It's your opinion, just go have it somewhere else, because flaming is pointless. Ahem, moving on, this picture was partially inspired by what I consider one of the best Naruto fan arts I personally have ever seen, which is entitle 'Cracked' by spacechicken814, and partially inspired by my seven-sugar caramel latte. Ah, life is good.

Disclaimer: HK doesn't own Naruto, or pixie stix, or the Spice Girls, or bicycles built for two....

WARNINGS!! As usual with my fics, there will be randomness, shounen-ai (boy/boy love), a little OOC, and a lot of crack. Also as usual, there will not be any sanity, seriousness, or reference to the canon, because heck, this is , made for FANON. Oh yeah, there might be some bad language too, and lots of pixie stix, which are like drugs for fairies.

One morning, there was a rather unorganised gathering at a ramen shop. Naruto, Sakura, Kankuro, Kiba, Rock Lee and Tenten were all rather worried, as certain members of their squads had mysteriously vanished. Upon realising that things would work much faster if they cooperated, they soon spread throughout the village, looking for random missing teammates. For some strange reason, it was Shikamaru who found them, which was strange because technically he shouldn't have known who he was looking for. However, this was put down as being just another strange thing about Shikamaru, and quickly cast aside, because the state of the formerly missing teammates was just more interesting. Sasuke and Gaara were slumped on the ground, laughing like a pair of total maniacs over something indistinguishable, Neji was singing nursery rhymes while apparently drawing Power Puff Girls comics on the ground in front of him with a stick, totally ignoring Shino, who was sitting beside him trying to shove pixie stix up his nose. Temari was rocking back and forth in the shade of a tree, giggling insanely and watching as Hinata attempted to sneak up on Neji and pour pixie stix in his hair. The only common factor of the group seemed to be that they were all very hyper indeed, which could probably be attributed to the large amount of empty or half empty tubes of pixie stix littering the ground. Tenten broke into a huge grin, and started rooting around her ninja kit for something. Hinata finally managed to pour the pixie stix in her hand onto Neji's head, at about the same time Shino dropped his down his coat and began wriggling. Neji burst into tears, running over to where Sasuke and Gaara were now giggling quietly.  
"Gaa-kun! Gaa-kun! 'Nata's being meeeean to me!" Tenten had produced a video camera, and hit the film button as Sasuke and Gaara stopped their giggling to look up at Neji like a pair of four year olds. There was a moment of silence, then Sasuke pointed at Neji and started laughing again.  
"Ha ha! Ji-ji's a cry-baby!" Neji sniffled, and Sasuke poked him, before pausing and staring in awe at his finger. "Oooooo... Ji-ji's warm!" There was another pause, during which all Neji's tears vanished and he stared down at his stomach where Sasuke poked him in awe.  
"Really?" Tentatively, as though he might bite, Gaara reached out and poked Neji too, before squealing and pouncing on him.  
"Ji-ji IS warm!" Sasuke looked thoughtful for a minute, then pounced on Neji too, just for the heck of it.  
"Yay!" Neji blinked for a second at the two crazy hyper ninja, then shrugged, grinning, and pumped both fists into the air.  
"Yay! I'm WARM!" Gaara poked him again, and giggled.  
"And SQUIDGY!" All three burst out laughing, singing about how 'Ji-ji' was 'warm and squidgy'. Of course, Tenten made sure to capture every moment on video, before turning her camera on Hinata and Shino, who were utterly fascinated by Shino's bugs, which seemed just as hyper as their host, and were currently buzzing around, and crashing into all kinds of things, including grass, leaves, Shino's nose, pixie stix, flowers, Temari, and each other. Of course, upon seeing the bugs, Temari flipped, screeching and climbing onto of her fan, crouching like a cat and yelling at any bugs that came near her that if they didn't get away she would 'set my bitch Kankuro on you!' Kankuro was a little embarrassed by his sister calling him her bitch, but since it was essentially true, he didn't comment. At least, he didn't comment until a bug managed to avoid Temari's flailing hands and climb to the top of her fan, at which Temari flung herself screaming at Shikamaru, glomping onto him like a koala and refusing to let go until 'all the nasty scary bugs are DEAD'. Snickering, Tenten captured that on film too, as Shikamaru attempted to pry the hysterical girl off him, with help from Kankuro. The only effect from this was that Temari clutched Shikamaru tighter, and bit Kankuro's finger. The shouting from this alerted the other hyperactive ninja that there were, in fact, other people present, and they then proceeded to stare at them with the light of hyperness making their eyes glow creepily. Naruto backed up a few steps.  
"Uh... guys? I really don't think this is a safe place to be right now..." Sasuke narrowed his eyes, suddenly pouncing on Naruto and bearing him to the ground.  
"NARI-CHAN!" Naruto blinked, then blushed because Sasuke was now lying on him. Sakura stared in shock as Sasuke, her crush, snuggled up to Naruto.  
"Wh, WHAT?!" Sasuke stopped nuzzling Naruto to scowl at her.  
"Don't like you." Sakura stared in shock before falling into a blue funk. Naruto blinked, then frowned, putting a hand on Sasuke's cheek.  
"You okay?" Sasuke giggled, licking Naruto's hand.  
"Spicy bacon flavour!" Naruto blushed, pulling his hand back.  
"Sasuke, I KNOW you like the kinky stuff, but I thought we agreed not to tell Sakura!" Everyone, including the hyper ones, turned to stare at them as Sakura looked over like impending doom.  
"Tell me WHAT?!" Naruto squeaked, and moved to hide under Sasuke. Sasuke, however, wasn't currently smart enough to realise the terrible danger they were in.  
"I'm GAY. Duh. With Naruto. Also, DUH." Sakura stared in shock, and Sasuke, apparently aware of the effect he was having, grinned wickedly. "And Naruto's ON TOP!" This was apparently too much for Sakura, who screamed in something like terror, before curling into a tiny ball and rocking back and forth. Tenten snickered, thanking every god she could name within five seconds that she had cleared her camera out that morning, so she had the full ten hours of tape available. Gaara and Neji, meanwhile, had lost interest in watching the others, and started playing a clapping game. Seeing that the entertainment from Naruto and Sasuke was rapidly heading in the direction of porn, Tenten turned her camera on them instead. Kankuro was very disturbed with how both his siblings were acting, and a little annoyed that Tenten was recording all of it, so he hurried over to try and pull Gaara away.  
"Come on, bro... something's wrong with you, but we CAN fix it." Gaara pouted, trying to pull away, and, surprisingly, failing. This might be because he currently had the same mental capacity as a normal five year old.  
"I DON'T WANNA! I WANNA PLAY WITH JI-JI!" Neji pouted as well, grabbing Gaara's hands.  
"GAA-CHAN'S BEING STOLEN!" The other hyper ninja looked over at once, and Kankuro glanced around before deciding it was better to just grab Gaara and run. He didn't get very far, however, as during the time it took him to try and yank Gaara away from Neji, Shino got behind him, all his bugs looming up into an ominous looking wall.  
"Put down the Gaara and walk away." Sasuke pouted, releasing Naruto to dive over and pounce on Gaara.  
"GAA-CHAN! DON'T LEAVE ME!" Neji jumped up and glomped onto Gaara as well. At the current moment, the girls weren't getting involved, but even Hinata had somehow contrived to look threatening. Kankuro sweatdropped, and Kiba snuck past Shino to grab his arm.  
"Trust me, guy, we should just leave Gaara and move. Shino doesn't kid around." Kankuro nodded in agreement, releasing Gaara's arm and backing away. Suddenly, and rather randomly, Shino grinned, waving his arms over his head.  
"LET'S SING!!" Kankuro gave Kiba a flat look.  
"He doesn't play around, huh?" Kiba was staring in shock as the other hyper guys grinned excitedly, clapping their hands.  
"Well... he USUALLY doesn't... you should know, you fought him!" Kankuro shrugged.  
"The author isn't referencing the canon, remember?" Shikamaru smacked him upside the head.  
"Dumbass, you'll break the Fourth Wall if you keep going like that!" Kankuro rolled his eyes.  
"Well you're not doing so well yourself, genius." Tenten waved a hand at them, grinning.  
"Ah, shush, you're interfering with the quality of the sound." Because by now, the boys had all agreed to sing, and someone had produced a boom box. A peppy, quick beat blasted out, and Sakura looked up from her cutting in shock as she recognised the song, just as a grinning Sasuke began to sing.  
"I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!" Shino grinned back, bouncing in time to the beat and singing into an invisible microphone.  
"So tell me what you want, what you really really want!" Kiba stared for a while, then almost collapsed laughing. Akamaru was also in hysterics, and Tenten was shaking, all except her camera hand, which remained magically steady. Sasuke was dancing cheerfully, for once in his life, and sang back.  
"I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!" Shino almost giggled, still not having figured out that he could use his bugs to make a microphone.  
"So tell me what you want, what you really really want!" Sasuke looked falsely thoughtful, tapping a finger off his chin.  
"I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna Na-ah-ru-to!" Sasuke winked at Naruto, who blushed. Neji moved into the foreground as well, singing into a microphone made of lime Jell-O.  
"If you want my future, forget my past!" Gaara, finally being true to his inner queen, danced his way forward as well, holding a microphone of strawberry jam.  
"If you wanna get with me, better make it fast." Sasuke, still with his air microphone, had began moving his whole body in time to the beat.  
"Now don't go wasting, my precious time!" Shino, now with a microphone made of raspberry milkshake, grinned, also dancing enthusiastically.  
"Get your act together, we could be just fine!" Surprisingly enough, the boys got really into it, and actually knew all the words. By the time they were finished, most of the village had stopped by to watch, because hey, a bunch of chunin, jonin, and the Kazekage singing the Spice Girls... well, who doesn't wanna watch? However, they were still incredibly hyper, so they didn't really notice their audience. As soon as the last notes faded though, they seemed to lose interest, and Hinata fell over, sneezing a cloud of pixie into the air. Somehow, the pixie managed to transform itself into a mushy pink background, and Sasuke snatched Naruto by the arm, yoinking him to his feet and skipping around in circles, Gaara and Shino sprinkling cherry blossoms into the air while Hinata, Temari and Neji, conveniently dressed as cherubs, frolicked around.  
"Naruto, Naruto, give me your answer do…" There was a muffled scream and a scuffle as the overenthusiastic nins tried to throw Sakura at them. "I'm half crazy, all for the love of you!" Naruto was blushing an impressive shade of red now, but also smiling, because it was CUTE. Pixie maniacs are scarily well choreographed. "It won't be a stylish marriage…" Temari hurried over to help Shino as Neji started yanking something out from behind a curtain. "I can't afford a carriage…" Shino and Temari finally got a good grip on poor Sakura's arms, lifting her off her feet. "But you'd look sweet…" Neji seemed to have produced a two-seater bicycle, and he and Gaara were trying to work it out. "Upon the seat…" An impatient Hinata crammed some fake cherry blossoms into Sakura's mouth to stop the screaming. "Of a bicycle built for two!" Gaara and Neji rode past on such a bicycle, smiling sweetly at exactly the same moment as Temari and Shino managed to toss the squirming Sakura, sending her flying into the two nins, knocking the bicycle over and landing all three in a lump. Sasuke ignored this, however, sweeping Naruto up onto a bicycle for two, and they rode off into the sunset. Temari and Hinata pouted down at their now wrecked mural as Sasuke and Naruto suddenly sped up, breaking warp speed and vanishing into the distance. Sakura slowly got to her feet, trembling with rage as she shunted herself away from the wreckage of the other bicycle, and Neji and Gaara, who couldn't be bothered to get up, and were now watching Shino's bugs with intense interest. All the currently sane ninja backed away as Sakura's glare swept over them, unseeing. This was NOT a good time to get in her way… even Tenten pointed her camera away, desperately hoping she hadn't caught any attention. The tense silence was broken rather surprisingly when Shino grabbed Sakura's hand.  
"Sakura…" She froze on the spot. "Saakuraa…" Shino's voice was uncharacteristically childish and whiny, and Kiba vaguely wondered if he shouldn't run to the rescue of his teammate. One glance at Sakura decided that though, because her eyes had vanished in an anime shadow. "Saaaaaaaakuraaaaa!" She spun around, glaring madly down at the somehow short Shino, fire in her eyes.  
"WHAT?!?!" Shino blinked up at her a few times, then his sunglasses fell off and his eyes seemed to explode to ten times their normal size, sparkling with cuteness.  
"HI!" As Sakura collapsed, twitching a zillion butterflies flew down, covering her body in their pretty butterfly-ness. Kankuro frowned thoughtfully, looking down at the butterflies.  
"So… which butterfly was it that if it flapped its wings, we're supposed to expect thunderstorms?" Kiba frowned thoughtfully down at the zillion or so butterflies milling about on Sakura.  
"I dunno.. I think it was a blue one." Tenten rolled her eyes.  
"No, it's meant to be green. I'm pretty sure…" Rock Lee struck a pose (he was still jealous of the dance routines).  
"It is the QUANTUM WEATHER BUTTERFLY OF YOUTH!" The sane ninjas gave him a variety of flat looks, then Tenten coughed embarrassedly, checking her camera controls.  
"Just ignore him…" Shikamaru rolled his eyes.  
"Everyone knows quantum weather butterflies have nothing to do with the weather." Rock Lee deflated a little, not understanding this UNYOUTHFUL and basically silly logic.  
"But-!" Kiba cleared his throat, looking down at the butterflies again.  
"So… whichever butterfly does weather… we should be safe if it's here, right?" At once, all the butterflies started flapping in unison, creating a gale which lifted Sakura up and away, vanishing into the distance. Tenten gave him a flat glare as one of the remaining butterflies landed on her head.  
"You had to say it." Then a small red and white pokeball bounced off her head. As she twitched, the rest of the ninja, sane or not, followed the path of the ball back into the hands of Shino, who grinned cutely, holding it up and beaming with pride.  
"I CAUGHT BUTTERFREE!"

And there, I think we surrender to the inevitable. :) Hey, that's two things finished in a week! GO ME! XD Hope you liked it, please R&R, and no, I have no idea who gave them pixie stix…(Shifty eyes)


End file.
